This is Jon’s new thing he does.

He “poisons” food with gluten and then has it all to himself.

All it takes is a crumb covered knife or a glutenous cracker dipped in the container and it’s all his. He claims it’s accidental, that he forgets, but I’m onto him. And I have to admit. Brilliant.

Particularly in this case. That’s a tub of everything cream cheese from Whole Foods up there. It tastes just like an everything bagel but there’s no bagel necessary. All the flavors are there in a (normally) gluten free, creamy, cheesy spread. It’s incredible. It’s also expensive. We were both enjoying it, making it last, until I found the sharpie mark of death.

Instead of going to buy more, I made my own. For real! I made cream cheese! Sort of. If we’re getting technical, it’s not really cheese at all. It’s yogurt. But who’s getting technical? It’s thick and creamy like cream cheese but so much healthier. I actually like it better than the store-bought version.  All it takes is a tub of yogurt, cheesecloth and time. The trick here is to drain as much fluid (whey) out of the yogurt as you can. The more you drain the thicker your “cheese” gets.

The everything flavor I made here includes sesame seeds, poppy seeds, garlic, onion and caraway seeds. But once you have the base, you can stir in anything you’d like. Strawberries, blueberries, scallions, cinnamon, anything…or everything. Even gluten.

Everything Cream Cheese

Ingredients:

1-32 ounce tub of low fat plain yogurt
1 teaspoon sesame seeds
1 teaspoon dried onion flakes
1 teaspoon dried garlic flakes
1/2 teaspoon poppy seeds
1/4 teaspoon caraway seeds
1/8 teaspoon kosher salt

Special Equipment:

cheesecloth
fine mesh strainer

Directions:

1. As shown above, place the yogurt in a cheesecloth lined mesh strainer resting in a bowl. Fold over the cheesecloth and place something heavy (like a spaghetti squash or a pan full of water) on the yogurt. Don’t skip this. It needs weight on top. Place in the refrigerator and let strain for at least 24 hours. I stirred mine maybe once or twice during that time.
2. Scrape the strained yogurt from the cheesecloth into a bowl and stir in desired mix-ins. It’s that easy! Enjoy!

 

Notes:

1. The first batch I didn’t drain long enough or use weight (the spaghetti squash) on top and it was more like mayonnaise than cream cheese. I actually added in the mix-ins anyway and mixed it with shredded chicken for an “everything chicken salad.” AMAZING!
2. I have dipped crackers in this, spread it on eggs and dipped veggies in it. It’s so flavorful. I’ve enjoyed it on most everything.
3. One 32 oz container of yogurt makes about 8 oz of cream cheese.
4. I was hoping to get another post up for Easter, but I’ve been sick this week and I don’t see that happening, so have a wonderful Easter and/or Passover if I don’t visit you here again before then!

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